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 God won't answer my prayers...

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angrywhiteguy

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Number of posts : 543
Age : 27
Location : Shitty town in the state of Washington
Registration date : 2009-01-10

PostSubject: God won't answer my prayers...   Mon Feb 23, 2009 8:18 pm

Angry White Guy: hey god
Angry White Guy: I'm a fan of your work
Angry White Guy: I'm sorry to say I don't believe in you, though
Angry White Guy: but that's what you get for not fashioning empirical evidence in your favor
Angry White Guy: and really, how hard could that be for you?
Angry White Guy: Oh well, I guess you just like being kind of a dick
Angry White Guy: btw, thanks for making me a middle class white male, things are going great
Angry White Guy: Hello? Are you there, God? It's me, Erik.
Angry White Guy: Fuck you, I'm becoming a Taoist


...he isn't responding.
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angrywhiteguy

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Number of posts : 543
Age : 27
Location : Shitty town in the state of Washington
Registration date : 2009-01-10

PostSubject: Re: God won't answer my prayers...   Mon Feb 23, 2009 8:55 pm

Update:

Never tell your password to anyone.
Angry White Guy: hey god
Angry White Guy: I'm a fan of your work
Angry White Guy: I'm sorry to say I don't believe in you, though
Angry White Guy: but that's what you get for not fashioning empirical evidence in your favor
Angry White Guy: and really, how hard could that be for you?
Angry White Guy: Oh well, I guess you just like being kind of a dick
Angry White Guy: btw, thanks for making me a middle class white male, things are going great
Angry White Guy: Hello? Are you there, God? It's me, Erik.
Angry White Guy: Fuck you, I'm becoming a Taoist
God is now Away.
God is now Online.
God: yeah im here
God: hey, i'm not the church type myself
God: more of an absurdist/ubermensch
Angry White Guy: :O
Angry White Guy: does this mean I'm a chosen prophet?
Angry White Guy: or have I lost my mind?
God: well Zuan is already my jesus-type figure
God: you can however add the suffix "prophet of god" to your name though
Angry White Guy: wow
Angry White Guy: wait till i tell my family and friends!
God: =D
Angry White Guy: hey god?
Angry White Guy: what the fuck is the platypus for?
God: well
God: i actually placed them there to confuse everyone
God: while they LOOK harmless
God: the males have a venemous barb behind their hind legs
God: which can easily kill a man
Angry White Guy: so you're a bit of a sick bastard?
God: pretty much
Angry White Guy: I KNEW IT
God: you know the comets that killed the dinosaurs? me
God: the black plague? me
God: the holocaust? hitler was actually a good friend of mine
God: bush? you guessed it, me
Angry White Guy: what about satan? we all blamed it on him
God: heh, that guy has nothing on me
God: omnipotence remember?
God: right now i'm working on something really special, but keep it hushed
Angry White Guy: ?
God: just wait a few years
God: you'll see
Angry White Guy: give me a hint
Angry White Guy: puhweeeeeeeeeeezze
God: think on a global scale
Angry White Guy: it isn't the fulfillment of the mayan doom prophecy?
Angry White Guy: is it?
Angry White Guy: armageddon?
God: well
God: perhaps >.>
God: fuck
God: i should have never given them ayahuasca
God: >.<
Angry White Guy: those natives are tricky little fuckers
God: yeha
God: gotta love them though for their use of drugs
Angry White Guy: thanks for making my race resistant to smallpox and alchohol
Angry White Guy: fun times
God: no worries man, i evened it up by making you super-sensitive to one of the dooms day viruses
Angry White Guy: awww
God: don't worry, it has simmilar effects to mustard gas
God: some of the others are much worse though
God: they just cause necrosis
Angry White Guy: is there an afterlife?
God: well
God: do you beleive in an afterlife?
Angry White Guy: hmm
Angry White Guy: this is one of those discworld thingies, huh?
Angry White Guy: it's whatever I believe?
God: pretty much
God: reallity it too subjective for me to be bothered creating zones for the arabs and jews in heaven
Angry White Guy: I now believe that I will take your place as god
God: well
God: that part doesnt happen
God: you can like, become an atom of me
Angry White Guy: no no no
God: by I control the mind and all that
Angry White Guy: i get your power
God: haha. no.
Angry White Guy: the whole enchilada
Angry White Guy: dont you dare try to jew me on this
God: well, there is a technicallity
God: I am greater than all things
God: including your scope of me
God: so you kinda can't fathom this shit
God: it's too deep man, you need to be on A LOT of acid
Angry White Guy: yes, but i can fathom that there are things that i cannot fathom
God: sure, but you still don't know the detail
God: it's like putting a chimp in a B-52
Angry White Guy: like heaven needs to be in detail? puh-lease
God: heaven? who said anything about that
God: i'm talking about raping mary when she's asleep, that kinda mystical stuff
God: i'd let a buddah in my place if one wanted, but none do
Angry White Guy: hm
God: best start meditating
Angry White Guy: okay, ill settle for ultra space pimp warrior scholar
God: sure man
God: that sounds good
Angry White Guy: woohoo
ADD Incarnate has changed their name to Ultra Space Pimp Warrior Scholar.
Angry White Guy has changed their name to Ultra Space Pimp Warrior Scholar.
Ultra Space Pimp Warrior Scholar: one last question
Ultra Space Pimp Warrior Scholar: how does chuck norris fit into all of this?
God: well, lets just say you took over his job
God: i just stripped him of his powers then
God: they should arrive in the mail in 5-10 business days
Ultra Space Pimp Warrior Scholar: sweet
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Eak

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Number of posts : 178
Age : 25
Registration date : 2009-02-09

PostSubject: Re: God won't answer my prayers...   Mon Feb 23, 2009 9:24 pm

OH TITS my name is Erik too. Let's unite to fight crime or something.
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angrywhiteguy

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Number of posts : 543
Age : 27
Location : Shitty town in the state of Washington
Registration date : 2009-01-10

PostSubject: Re: God won't answer my prayers...   Mon Feb 23, 2009 11:48 pm

Fuck yeah, league of Eriks!

We should make a clan, non-Eriks can only be "honorary members".

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Mr_19
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Number of posts : 489
Age : 96
Location : Moscow, Russia
Registration date : 2009-01-07

PostSubject: Re: God won't answer my prayers...   Tue Feb 24, 2009 12:03 pm

lol is this the god whos in PCJ?
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sev the fucking viking

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Number of posts : 181
Age : 23
Location : up north
Registration date : 2009-01-10

PostSubject: Re: God won't answer my prayers...   Tue Feb 24, 2009 2:52 pm

yeah, i think so...
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Eak

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Number of posts : 178
Age : 25
Registration date : 2009-02-09

PostSubject: Re: God won't answer my prayers...   Tue Feb 24, 2009 3:18 pm

Look, they made a movie about us.
And apparently Jesus was crucified on a lady, not a cross.


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Shameles
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PostSubject: Re: God won't answer my prayers...   Wed Feb 25, 2009 1:47 pm

PCJ has a god?...
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Mr_19
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Age : 96
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Registration date : 2009-01-07

PostSubject: Re: God won't answer my prayers...   Thu Feb 26, 2009 10:22 pm

Shameles wrote:
PCJ has a god?...
you mean besides patrick? God is an aussie killed who does acid. He fills us with his holy light and wisdom.
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